Domestic violence deniers

Here’s a great article by Corey Pein in the Santa Fe Reporter. I’ve often asked, is she a liar or is he a denier? The stereoptype that women lie for malicious reasons is deeply embedded in our society (and certainly the Fathers Rights groups capitalize on this).  How many know that denial is the trademark of an abuser? Why do we minimize a couple’s conflict into a “he said/she said” when the repurcussions of the conflict can end in permanent injury or even death?

Many in the Fathers Rights groups mimic abusers – they minimize, rationalize or call domestic violence mutual. They use research that is based on self report to call attention to female-initiated violence. The data they use does not capture the context of abuse (was it self defense, for example) nor does it capture severe abuse, violence during separation (the highest point of danger for women), or homicide. Females do use what’s called Common Couple Violence – throwing things, hitting, slapping. Females, however, are far more likely to be seriously injured or killed by their partner than males are.

The Fathers Rights groups also claim women are more likely to abuse their children. This data, actually, is based on households – including those led by single mothers. When males and females are compared equally, males are more likely to commit child abuse – and again, it is more severe and fatal. Men are more likely to kill babies in shaken baby syndrome. They are also overwhelmingly the ones to commit child sexual abuse. I do not deny women abuse children – I simply believe facts should be used – not propaganda like that coming from the angry men that make up the Fathers Rights groups. It’s not constructive.

They also attack the Violence Against Women Act. Funny, because VAWA’s biggest success is probably that the rate of women killing men has gone down drastically. Why? Because these women, many of whom were abused, can go to a shelter rather than kill their abuser. They also want to limit restraining orders and punish women for false allegations (which means not producing enough witnesses or evidence).  They’ve sued shelters and stopped funding for pro-bono legal help for women.

It’s clear what their agenda is: remove protection for women and children. Until they acknowledge the seriousness of domestic violence, we will be at a stalemate. They will be angrily chipping away at safety measures for women and children. We will be left, with the few resources we do have, to clutching the few measures we do have that protect us from domestic harm. Domestic violence has only been recognized publicly for 4 decades – laws, especially regarding marital rape, are still evolving. At its infancy, it’s being attacked.   

Man up by Corey Pein

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5 comments on “Domestic violence deniers

  1. Michael Hallett says:

    To all who were unfortunate enough to read this tangled web of spin, deciept, dark delusion, and distorted perceptions.
    Do not despair.
    The majority of women see it for what it is.
    Devoid of natural love.

    Seasons greetings and goodwill to all.

  2. MissJ says:

    PAS is junk science, not supported by any major medical/psychological association. There is no evidence needed,solely a damaged relationship, which can also be due to relationship skills, depression/anxiety during divorce, witness to violence, victims of abuse. There is no scientific means to distinguish an “alienated” children from an abused child. PAS masks abuse.

    Stating PAS results in problems is akin to saying single mothers are responsible for social ills – superficial research that overlooks poverty, racism, health problems, etc. that can be linked to social ills. Nothing substantial to add to the conversation, just scapegoating.

  3. David Scott says:

    Thank you for this Article. Fathers’ right to be a meaningful part of their childrens’ lives, have been eroded to the point of non-existence. My research suggests that this is a phenomenon consistent throughout the industrialized nations. Children who are alienated from their fathers are more likely later in life to have emotional/behavioral problems, suffer from depression, drop out of school, fail in their jobs, and suffer from other social problems. I invite you to visit my site devoted to raising awareness on this growing problem: http://fathersprivilege.blogspot.com/

  4. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by randi james, S. Vyers. S. Vyers said: Domestic violence deniers « Media Misses http://bit.ly/8jC4vZ […]

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