Kudos to the Baltimore Sun for Susan Reimer’s piece, In families’ tragic deaths, a hint of paternalism (Apr. 27).
With brutal honesty she says what most of us already know in the domestic violence field:
It wasn’t the economy. It wasn’t stress. It wasn’t mental illness.
It hit me the minute I heard the news – it was ownership.
When William Parente beat and suffocated his wife and two daughters before taking his own life, it wasn’t just because his shaky financial dealings were about to come crashing down on him.
And when Christopher Wood killed his wife and three children and then himself, it wasn’t just because he was $460,000 in debt and depressed.
Lots of people go through economic difficulty, even bankruptcy. These are not risk factors for killing. When men kill their wife and children, they are not “snapping” as a result of stress– often, in fact, it’s premeditated. Planning, however, does not include getting a consensus from the family, it involves the man making the executive decision. He makes the decisions, he executes the plans. Period. Until we stop making excuses and start getting to the root of the problem, we will suffer these fatal consequences. Thanks to the Baltimore Sun for shining a light on the root of the problem and stating what many of us are afraid to say (or hear).